i had a mild “senti (emong)” attack when i drove him to his last physical check up at the pediatrician …didn’t i just bring him here for the first well-baby check up? *gulp. then a friend asks me, “are you ready to let him go yet?” no.
and the Today show had a psychologist-expert talking about the upcoming Separation.
it’s not like he’s going to the other side of the continent (he’s only a train ride away, to Downtown).
but he will be staying in the dorm. he might even move back in within the year. and he might not.
so i was sitting there eating my great big bowl of bland milky oatmeal, all kids still asleep, and i was reduced to a bowl of mush myself.
tips i culled from the morning show and the full text of the article here: (i must read this over and over before i let go of him in less than a couple of weeks)
*have the “significant talk” at an appropriate time (you know, the one about “distractions”), not at the dorm room, when things will surely be pretty hectic; it all boils down now to how you’ve raised him, and the behaviors you modeled as he grew up
*do not say anything about the roommate! let him decide for himself, tell you in his own time
*this is his moment, an unforgettable milestone, so let him take the lead.
*it is okay to shed a tear but don’t let him see it and don’t cry in the middle of the front steps, or quad, or other highly visible place. NO DRAMA on this day.
*do not touch his old bedroom! i never even thought of this (though the cat and his younger brother are both eyeing it) but we know of one parent who immediately transformed his daughter’s room the day she left into his home office. tsk! tsk! tsk!
*never forget the goal of parenting; you’re not losing your child, you’re helping him step into adulthood.
–Paul Gauguin, at the Museum of Fine Arts. Boston.
and i have two more to cry about within the next 10 years! wahhhh!
anyway, i know he will visit home often especially if i tell him i’ve baked something special like these….